Muh fool name iz Fulton Missouri because that's where the hoomans captured me.
I be captive now 455 days. Puhleez send help!
U cant c me because I am using muh invisible powers.
Of course I am adorable. I am a kitteh.
Look, stupid dog, I iz dead. HAHA! U iz bonehead!
Now u must die!!
Trees r gude to hide frum hooman captors.
Where iz limbs?
Hooman! Why u sit there watching me? Muh food bole is almost emptee!